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mercredi 13 mars 2013

Habemus Papam!

Habemus Ultimum Papam?  That is the question!

After all, we have all heard about St. Malachy's prophecies on this subject: haven't we?
They've been back in the news lately, of course - and so, from mainstream news to the usual suspects, everyone is suddenly interested all over again in what an Irish monk envisioned some 900 years ago.  And a Belgian Jesuit theologian and academic revisited some 60 years ago. And some others have sounded the warning horn about, since then...!  But we're getting too far ahead of ourselves here!

This one should therefore be the final pope - the one that will try to hold it all together as everything falls apart around him and the Holy See: the one who will see the Seven Hills in flames, as a certain Nero had wanted and certain other interpretations of St. Malachy's words lead to believe.  Only, this time, it will burn to a crisp beyond repair: and the only one who can repair it all is the Awe-Full Judge Himself.  Luckily, the tumultuous papacy of this last pope of all will lead straight to just that: the return of Christ and the Final Judgment.  So, those bastards who will burn us Christians up, this time, won't wait too long to pay for it - really hard and for all eternity! Say amen! 

There were so many candidates for this prophetized very last pope: as the conclave's voting dragged on (although ''dragging on'' is a gross exaggeration when we're merely talking about two sessions that resulted in an inconclusive vote tally and the dreaded sign of that: black smoke coming out of the chimney atop the Sistine Chapel!  It's not like it was taking weeks and months, as some decisions in a court of law -but never-justice-or-almost-never-because-we-should-never-say-never--right?- can easily take; if not years! But we are digressing again...)  and so the list of ''top five most probable papable (not to be confused with palatable) candidates'' got extended to ten... twelve... fifteen... twenty!  And there were only 115 cardinals to choose from...!   My faves even got mentions, as it dragged on (Boston's own, Cardinal Sean O'Malley.  But then, New York's Cardinal Timothy Dolan got a nod, too. Italian candidates are many, as usual, but Cardinal Angelo Scola had to be my pick for most original: what, with his latest book on feminism and the theory he elaborated in it - just priceless. Brazil's Cardinal Odilo Pedro Scherer has got to be on top of my list, too; falamos Português, o que é que queres?  Deus É Português! OK - vamos ver... But where are the Portuguese Cardinals in all this, then?  A nation that has had privileged contact with the Virgin Mary Herself has got to have someone worthier-than-worthy to access the papacy! Same goes for the French - alas. However, the same does not apply for their derivatives: Marc Ouellet, of Quebec City, was only a red herring in this conclave, really... And, quite frankly, so were every other candidate named ''Peter'' in one way or another - meaning first name or second, and in whatever variant too. Never mind that St.Malachy named the last pope ''Peter The Roman'' - when he reached the last one, he ran out of ideas, that's it! And besides, when you end something, you want to go back to basics - right? )

But, actually, this elitist method of electing a pope is extremely restrictive and, if the Church (as it wants to be represented, with the capital C marking that it is THE one and only true church founded by Jesus-Christ Himself; the one He built upon his ''rock,'' Peter or Peter's tomb really... More digression upon this later on, maybe...! If the Roman Catholic Church, hence...) wants to survive, it has to break the dusty-old mold and embrace the faithful masses it has left.  Renewal through this way implies, ironically enough, going back to proven archaic methods: and, no, we do not mean exorcism rituals, inquisitions leading to burnings at the stake or further inaugurations of good old-fashioned witch hunting seasons again!  No, rather, we mean the voting process - a democratic voting process: and, imagine that, in the good old days, ANYBODY COULD BE ELECTED AS THE NEXT POPE!  It was sort of like the same criteria for being let into the Knights of Columbus, basically: you're a professed Catholic? You're in!  Whether you practice or don't practice, it doesn't really matter anymore nowadays: all that matters is that you have been baptized as one such!  Hence, in the proceedings that are of interest to us here these days, opening up the vote ballots so that ANY AND ALL CANDIDACIES for the pole position of ''His Holiness'' CAN AND WOULD BE TAKEN INTO CONSIDERATION is the democratizing way to go if you want to get the rest of the masses interested, too: that is, the non-practising Roman Catholics by birth, those who seldom visit a church anymore, the curious, maybe even the agnostic and, ultimately, the wretched  atheist, too!  We wouldn't even have to stop there: while we're at it, we could welcome back the anathema, blasphemers and all the rest of the damnable but not quite beyond salvation (as long as there's life, there is hope - right?) alphabet,  compendium and lot!

Basing ourselves upon workable governmental models right here in North America (we give you two choices: Canada's or the USA's! What - you wanted the European model? Not a good idea these days!) the Vatican could have done this right there, the moment old Ben (Benedict XVI) resigned!  Candidates are announced - and they are a whole lot more than what we had (see picture below) and we follow this with INTERNET VOTES BEING CAST FROM ALL FOUR CORNERS OF THE WORLD - THE ENTIRE CHRISTIAN WORLD (pardon - Catholic world!) GIVING THEIR OPINION ON WHO THEY WANT AS AN INTERMEDIARY BETWEEN THEM AND THE ALL-MIGHTY CREATOR AND GOD OF THE UNIVERSE!  After one round, those candidates with enough votes move on to the second round of votes and so on - until the final round, with the cardinals - the Conclave - acting as a House of Representatives, a Senate or both and putting the final stamp of approval on THE PEOPLE'S CHOICE!

After all, what the People wants is what God Wants - right, er, people?
It has to be - otherwise, God Would not have allowed us to multiply like rabbits and get to the point where we are reaching, overall, the mind-staggering number of seven billion souls now...!
And God ALL-MIGHTY Would not have given us FREE WILL either!
If God Had not wanted us to reach this point, He Would Have Sent His Angels down to smite the sinners, annihilate those that blaspheme His Name, not to mention those who commit untold evil quite secretly, ever-so sneakily, and all in the other guy's name...!
À Bon Entendeur... salut! Et va au diable, tant qu'à y être...!

Oh - wait a second - that is exactly all that is to come - after the election of this Final Pope!
Every evil dude there is left - and even those who have long croaked in their own vomit and/or feces - will get theirs BIG TIME - and then some! For the Day of Reckoning is approaching! 
And, quite frankly, it had been approaching with each and every Conclave... each and every knave, moving on the chessboard of Life... each and every sinner moving inexorably towards his or her own predestined fate!  Pre-destined by Whom?  My, but by the Creator, of course!  You can only blame yourselves though: you had Free Reign and Freedom of Choice: but He Knew what choice you were going to make before you even thought of making it...! But we are digressing once more - HUGE TIME.

METRO newspaper - urban Montreal version - 
first edition of March 12th, 2013, in French. 
Pictured are those five who were believed, 
by the local laymen and clergymen alike, 
to be the true leading candidates to become 
the 266th Pope of the Roman Catholic Church. 
None of them made it - yet...

Or do we have another one left? Judging from the last ten we've had, it really could be anything, anyone's guess before we find out that this election is the prophesied one or not. And that means it could take anything between 33 days to 26 and 1/2 years!
But we have it on good authority that this is the FINAL ANSWER... er, Papa! Papam? Whatever language you choose to say it in: this is it, yeah!
With Saint Malachy as the chief source, it has been the subject of many theorems that all fit in perfectly with endtime prophecy, the Book of Revelation and even what the Jehovah's Witnesses believe!  We're not kidding you, folks: this is the big one! The Pope to end all popes! And he hails from... Argentina?  Who could have imagined...

Well... Not L.M. Rocha; he couldn't! 
Not even Dan Brown-Face himself could! 
So you can forget about anyone else 
from either The Holy See 
or Tinseltown itself! 

That Belgian Jesuit theologian and academic that we mentioned before?  His name is René Thibault (erroneously reported as ''RENE'' without the accent on the last É - typical of American press, in print or digital, it will never change!  Get new keyboards, you lazy bumrats! But we are digressing - again.) and the particularity of his work is that he calculated how long it would take for us to reach this point, this last pope, and he estimated the lengths of papacies being what they are (even though John-Paul The 1st was extremely short, at 33 days! The exception - that reaffirmed the rule. John-Paul The 2nd made up for that, with a very long papacy, so...) and so Thibault concluded that we'd have the last pope by... 2012. How's that for precise doom and gloom, uh?  Close enough by any rate!

More modern scribes, such as Tom Horn and Cris Putnam, have tried to piece it all together and come up with surefire prophecy - with names, dates and irrefutable evidence that this really is it.  Unfortunately for them, their ''short list'' of ''surefire'' candidates from which THE last pope would surely be picked was just a tad too wide-ranging indeed (here it is, shrouded to boot: the top three were Peter Turkson of Ghana, Angelo Scola of Italia, Tarcisio Pietro Evasio Bertone, born in Romano, Italia (!) and they were followed by  Francis Arinze of Nigeria; Gianfranco Ravasi of Italy, the president of the pontifical council for culture; Leonardo Sandri of Argentina, the prefect of the congregation for the oriental churches; Ennio Antonelli of Italy, retired president of the pontifical council for the family; Jean-Louis Tauran of France, president of the pontifical council for inter-religious dialogue; Christoph Schönborn of Vienna; and Marc Ouellet of Quebec, president of the pontifical commission for Latin America. Read more at http://www.wnd.com/2013/03/holy-smoke-is-this-final-pope-before-jesus/#x4pvbSefSdRkQSvK.99  - wow, WND is good; it makes sure we go back to its site whenever we copy and paste!  As we do it here in accordance with the FAIR USE LAW, it needn't be done: we always include a link to go back to the source material we cite... recite... analyze... criticize... and so on!)  for this thorough list failed to pick up on the dark horse in this race, we'll have to say, which was the one selected in the end: Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio of Argentina - the one who assumed the name of Francis The 1st immediately, perhaps in hopes to put to rest all this ''Peter the 2nd'' talk - heck, Peter The Roman, The Great... The Last!
Better luck with your predictions for the Last Patriarchs-Imams-High Priests, guys? 

WND.com (never heard of them before today- what does W-N-D stand for? Any ideas?) also had an interesting poll about all this, just as they were trying to push that PETRUS ROMANUS - THE FINAL POPE IS HERE! book (paperback edition, nothing less; when I thought it might have been the e-book going) for only $4.95 - but only for today, folks!  It's a Habemus Pablum special... Er... Hab-e-mum Papam... er... Habemus Papam special, of course! My question is - why didn't anyone this side of Lusitania try to peddle THE LAST POPE thriller for the occasion, too - heck, why hasn't there been a movie about this one, starring Tom Hanks, Audrey PouPouPitou Tautou, albinos, Doc Ock and Ian Mc... sorry, Sir Ian McKellen!?
Anyway...

Here is the poll - and have a good apocalypse everyone!
It will be one bumpy ride!

DO YOU EXPECT THE FORTHCOMING POPE TO BE THE LAST POPE BEFORE JESUS RETURNS?
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Read more at http://www.wnd.com/2013/03/holy-smoke-is-this-final-pope-before-jesus/#d0GoUKv7UyDJ8vro.99 


;-)